Three Interesting Things

1. The entirety of #RomBkLove fills me with joy, but Corey's lists in particular are always filled with great books I have and hove not yet read.  

2. Judith Viorst is 90 and has some thoughts on liking where you are. 

3. Jackie Lau talks about what she looks for and also strives for in representation of biracial characters in romance. 

Remembrances and Long Weekends

I don't know that any of my relative fought in the Civil War.  The Hawaiian side of the family was clearly in place, but not yet USian.  I have some other European descended relations who I know did some missionary type things in the New England area, and some relatives who ended up in Oregon in the early 1900's. Their location and activities in the 1800's are not currently known to me.  

I do know that my great grandfather wrote editorials in opposition to the Ku Klux Klan in the 1920's, and I know I have had relatives involved in World War II, the Vietnam War, and some of the more recent non-war war stuff we do these days.  As far as I am aware, none of them died directly in the war, although certainly one died much younger than we would have hoped.  

Memorial Day has expanded it's reach and purpose these days, but started as a decoration day of sorts, after the Civil War created a lot of dead soldiers who needed proper burial.  

And growing up, Memorial Day became a weekend we often went to visit friends and family in Connecticut.  A day associated with long car rides, to arrive to weather that always felt a little cooler than I expected in Connecticut, and involved things like tennis (usually watching on my part) and the sounds and smells of salt water and trains.  

This year I stayed in DC, celebrated a birthday with a friend, and cuddled cats at the cat cafe with other friends.  So there was food, several kinds of ice cream, cats, yarn, and various iced drinks.  It was good. 

Three Interesting Things

1. This article pointed out an important thing, that many kids are un or under vaccinated because health care is costly, especially if you might have moved and had to re-set up all the visits and everything and not thought to grab all the medical records to bring with you.  (I think these days we tend to assume everything is either online or faxable, but different health care systems are not designed to talk to each other well.) 

2. Doug Glanville's piece on the was it/wasn't it/isn't the result the same of being racially taunted with intentionally ambiguous gestures is thoughtful. 

3. If you needed a piece about Broadway's use of animatronic dicks, well, here you are. 

Abortion is Heath Care

CW: topics include rape and incest

I think my stance that safe and legal abortion should be available to the folks that need it is clear. (If not, hi!)

One of the things that concerns me about recent discussions around the excessive abortion laws recently passed in several states have focused a lot on the timing of when they allow abortion, and the lack of exceptions for rape and incest. I agree that victims of rape and incest deserve utmost sympathy, and we should always look to those who have experienced the most harm when trying to craft good laws. But the choice to terminate a pregnancy isn't just about pregnancies that cannot survive, pregnancies that risk the parent's life, or pregnancies that might risk continuing a previous harm. 

Abortion is a medical procedure, and that choice should be made by the patient with any appropriate advice from various medical and health professionals. 

The sex ed class I teach operates under rules of secrecy. So I can't tell you things students have said. I can tell you one of the exercises on parenthood asks the students to make the choice from six sets of parents to place a hypothetical baby. The idea behind the exercise is to look at lots of different configurations of parents - couples and singles, rich and working class, gay and straight, differing education levels, and differing ages. And then rank them and discuss and defend (politely) their choices. None of the answers are wrong answers. But the idea is to think about what might make the best scenario for parenthood and to imagine alternatives. 

Because the overall idea, as with so much of sex ed, is that there are lots of choices you can make. Figuring out what you want helps you better express it to others. But also things change. And the critical thinking you do about issues now will also prepare you any time you need to reassess. 

We also cover contraceptives in our class. But the other reality is this. Sex is fun. People engage in sex for lots of reasons and pregnancy is only one of the reasons. So the idea that people who are pregnant and don't want to be have - unless assaulted - earned this is based on a misunderstanding of sex. Humans, unlike many other animals, can and do engage in sex when pregnancy is not possible. Because sex is not just about pregnancy. 

Parenthood is a big huge thing that not everyone is ready or even able to undertake. Sure, some will rise to the challenge. And some won't. And the pregnant person is in the best situation to assess their options. 

And if their option is, oh no, I couldn't possibly, then I want them to have the care they need for that. Just as if they say, well, okay new (or continuing) adventure, I want them to have the care and support they need for that too. 

"Let's Go Steal a Podcast" - The Scheherazade Job

I was back on Let's Go Steal a Podcast talking about "The Scheherazade Job" - aka violins and violence.  

And because I forgot to send this link to Christina, for those who want to dive deeper on people faking their death on the internet.