I saw the term caution fatigue and it resonated. Being cautious is hard. I had a thing that required an in person meetup on Saturday and everyone I was meeting with was masked and engaging in some social distancing, but it's so easy to forget. I walked over to someone and leaned close to point to the part of the paper that they needed. I realized my error and backed up and of course we were both masked. In travelling to and from the location there were folks wandering the streets unmasked, showing no care for social distancing. Folk carrying their masks in their hands on metro*. Folks, who like me, clearly hadn't ridden a bus in a while so stood near the front to enter and had to be directed to the back.
We have changed how so many interactions work and it's hard. It's hard to be in a constant state of learning. It's hard to remember all these new rules.
And of course when you are trying to maintain a new habit, like watch less TV and you forget and flip the TV on, it's so easy to keep it on. Right? You've already failed, might as well enjoy the failure.
After I shared germs with more people than I had planned for the day, I could have also gone grocery shopping, gone to a restaurant, done lots of things and just figured, what the heck. Instead I went home. And I am going to try to be extra cautious for the next two weeks.
But it's hard. Because I also want pizza or queso or something else that doesn't currently exist in my apartment.
The thing I was reading suggested exercise will help. (It was a place that offers exercise classes, so grain of salt there.) But the idea that keeping our physical and emotional selves well in whatever manner we choose has some value. We are all learning and doing a lot of things differently. There will be days we do not meet our own standards. And that's okay. But it is worth continuing to try our best.
*Masks are required to be worn the entire time on metro, as the signs and audio announcements remind you.
